Funny Quotes

Laughter is free therapy. These quotes are here to make you smile, snort, or genuinely laugh out loud. They cover the absurdity of life, the comedy of human nature, and the particular genius of people who can make a serious point while being hilarious.

“There's also a certain rhythm to the way Jews talk that might be funny.”

Larry David

More Funny Quotes

“It's funny, as you live through something you're not aware of it.”

Maya Lin

“The funny thing about me that most people never really understand is that, at heart, I'm really a jock.”

Billy Corgan

“It is funny that men who are supposed to be scientific cannot get themselves to realise the basic principle of physics, that action and reaction are equal and opposite, that when you persecute people you always rouse them to be strong and stronger.”

Gertrude Stein

“I think since I was kid people told me that they thought I was funny.”

Demetri Martin

“It takes considerable knowledge just to realize the extent of your own ignorance.”

Thomas Sowell

“I know what Germans are. They are a funny people. They are always choosing someone to lead them in a direction which they do not want to go.”

Gertrude Stein

“It's funny when you're a kid how you can acclimate to almost anything.”

Adam Carolla

“My parents are very funny when they have to deal with anything racy or off-color. They usually pretend they don't speak English.”

Margaret Cho

“If God wanted us to bend over he'd put diamonds on the floor.”

Joan Rivers

“Have enough sense to know, ahead of time, when your skills will not extend to wallpapering.”

Marilyn vos Savant

“Karaoke isn't fair when you're a comedian. The whole idea is to get people laughing and enjoying themselves, and I'm a professional funny guy.”

Chris Rock

“I read a lot of scripts that I just don't find very funny.”

Jennifer Aniston

“I can never tell when something is funny. I just have to do it onstage and find out.”

Margaret Cho

“It would be pretty funny to see a Beverly Hills white girl with mad rap skills.”

Tori Spelling

“There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God.”

Bill Cosby

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