Dave Barry

Dave Barry

37 quotes

Dave Barry, an American author and columnist born in 1947, is someone whose words carry as much weight as their professional legacy. The range of their thinking — from Religion to Car — speaks to an intellectual restlessness that shows in every quote. Our collection holds 47 quotes from Dave Barry, each offering a different angle on Religion, Car, Teen, Technology, and Sports. A line that stays with you: "The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates."

“Auto racing is boring except when a car is going at least 172 miles per hour upside down.”

— Dave Barry

Car

All Quotes by Dave Barry

“As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula.”

— Dave Barry

Fear

“It was Public Art, defined as art that is purchased by experts who are not spending their own personal money.”

— Dave Barry

Art

“The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion or ethnic background, is that we all believe we are above-average drivers.”

— Dave Barry

Age

“Bill Gates is a very rich man today... and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions.”

— Dave Barry

Technology

“I want a pit crew... I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems.”

— Dave Barry

Car

“I have been a gigantic Rolling Stones fan since approximately the Spanish-American War.”

— Dave Barry

War

“It always rains on tents. Rainstorms will travel thousands of miles, against prevailing winds for the opportunity to rain on a tent.”

— Dave Barry

Travel

“To an adolescent, there is nothing in the world more embarrassing than a parent.”

— Dave Barry

Teen

“I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer.”

— Dave Barry

Computers

“The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl.”

— Dave Barry

Funny

“The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious people, and then they come after you with machetes.”

— Dave Barry

Religion

“The Internet: transforming society and shaping the future through chat.”

— Dave Barry

Computers

“I believe that we parents must encourage our children to become educated, so they can get into a good college that we cannot afford.”

— Dave Barry

Good

“Big business never pays a nickel in taxes, according to Ralph Nader, who represents a big consumer organization that never pays a nickel in taxes.”

— Dave Barry

Business

“Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face.”

— Dave Barry

Sports

“The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number.”

— Dave Barry

Age

“The world is full of strange phenomena that cannot be explained by the laws of logic or science. Dennis Rodman is only one example.”

— Dave Barry

Science

“Hobbies of any kind are boring except to people who have the same hobby. This is also true of religion, although you will not find me saying so in print.”

— Dave Barry

Religion

“Never assume that the guy understands that you and he have a relationship.”

— Dave Barry

Relationship

“Geographically, Ireland is a medium-sized rural island that is slowly but steadily being consumed by sheep.”

— Dave Barry

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