P

P. J. O'Rourke

56 quotes

P. J. O'Rourke (1947–2022) was an American political satirist and journalist known for his sharp, irreverent commentary on politics, economics, and culture. A self-described "Republican Party reptile," O'Rourke brought libertarian sensibilities and laugh-out-loud humor to subjects that most writers treat with deadly seriousness.

“I like to think of my behavior in the sixties as a 'learning experience.' Then again, I like to think of anything stupid I've done as a 'learning experience.' It makes me feel less stupid.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Experience

All Quotes by P. J. O'Rourke

“People are always angry at America. They're absolutely certain that America either caused their problems or is deliberately not fixing their problems. But the anger is always directed at America and never at Americans.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Anger

“There's a certain kind of behavior in the Arab world that, to me, resembles the way young men behave when there is no significant influence from women in their lives.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Women

“The great thing about being a print journalist is that you are permitted to duck. Cameramen get killed while the writers are flat on the floor. A war correspondent for the BBC dedicated his memoir to 50 fallen colleagues, and I guarantee you they were all taking pictures. I am only alive because I am such a chicken.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Great

“When buying and selling are controlled by legislation, the first things to be bought and sold are legislators.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Politics

“One of the enduring problems with certain societies in the world - and this is certainly true of a lot of places in the Middle East - is that the capacity for self-governance and self-organizing just isn't there. It has to do with history.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

History

“Never wear anything that panics the cat.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Pet

“I like making things. I have a wood shop at home. I am a terrible carpenter but I love doing it.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Home

“Because of their size, parents may be difficult to discipline properly.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Funny

“Let's reintroduce corporal punishment in the schools - and use it on the teachers.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Teacher

“In our brief national history we have shot four of our presidents, worried five of them to death, impeached one and hounded another out of office. And when all else fails, we hold an election and assassinate their character.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Death

“Ideology, politics and journalism, which luxuriate in failure, are impotent in the face of hope and joy.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Failure

“Feeling good about government is like looking on the bright side of any catastrophe. When you quit looking on the bright side, the catastrophe is still there.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Good

“Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Love

“There is one thing women can never take away from men. We die sooner.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Men

“There are plenty of problems in the world, and doubtless climate change - or whatever the currently voguish phrase for it all is - certainly is one of them. But it's low on my list.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Change

“My wife and I both come from Irish families. There are two kinds of Irish families: the hitting kind and the kidding kind. If you're fortunate - and both of us are - you come from the kidding kind of Irish family.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Family

“Children must be considered in a divorce considered valuable pawns in the nasty legal and financial contest that is about to ensue.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Legal

“People will tell you anything but what they do is always the truth.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Truth

“Never fight an inanimate object.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Funny

“The inherent purpose of American government is let people seek their own goals and to encourage them to be responsible on the various adventures they have on their way to those goals, good, bad, and otherwise.”

— P. J. O'Rourke

Government