Larry David

Larry David

23 quotes

An American comedian, writer and actor active since the 1940s, Larry David has long been a source of memorable observations. Beyond his dry wit, portrayals of awkward social situations, and brutally honest takes on everyday life, Larry David proved equally skilled at capturing ideas in a sentence or two. Our collection holds 25 quotes from Larry David, each offering a different angle on Funny, Home, Change, Women, and Money. Here is a taste of their wisdom: "Even back then, I exuded self-confidence, and that drives women crazy."

“I still think of that guy I was without a wife or kids, and I still want to entertain that guy. The lonely guy, the frustrated guy, the guy with no money - this is the guy who needs to laugh.”

— Larry David

Money

All Quotes by Larry David

“If you tell the truth about how you're feeling, it becomes funny.”

— Larry David

Funny

“Sometimes I have these fantasies of just moving to a foreign country and coming back with a full head of hair. Or not even come back! Make a new life there with hair... Change my name, just see what happens.”

— Larry David

Change

“I wanted to make a living, but I really was not interested in money at all. I was interested in being a great comedian.”

— Larry David

Money

“The best situation is being a single parent. The best part about is that you get time off, too, because the kids are with their mom, so it's the best of both worlds. There's a lot to be said for it.”

— Larry David

Mom

“Obviously comedic styles do change.”

— Larry David

Change

“I gave a funny speech at my wife's birthday party, and I'm thinking, 'Hey, I've still got it.'”

— Larry David

Birthday

“The only change I can really see is that I don't have to shop for pants in stores anymore.”

— Larry David

Change

“Well, after the divorce, I went home and turned all the lights on!”

— Larry David

Home

“I couldn't be happier that President Bush has stood up for having served in the National Guard, because I can finally put an end to all those who questioned my motives for enlisting in the Army Reserve at the height of the Vietnam War.”

— Larry David

War

“Religion doesn't play any part in my life in terms of how I live my life. But I don't think I've ever gone through a day in my life without hearing someone say the word 'Jew' or saying it myself.”

— Larry David

Religion

“When you're not concerned with succeeding, you can work with complete freedom.”

— Larry David

Freedom

“I still think of that guy I was without a wife or kids, and I still want to entertain that guy. The lonely guy, the frustrated guy, the guy with no money - this is the guy who needs to laugh.”

— Larry David

Money

“I was planning on my future as a homeless person. I had a really good spot picked out.”

— Larry David

Future

“Once I know people know who I am, it gives me a lot of licence and freedom to behave in ways I wouldn't normally.”

— Larry David

Freedom

“There are times when I'm driving home after a day's shooting, thinking to myself, That scene would've been so much better if I had written it out.”

— Larry David

Home

“Women love a self-confident bald man.”

— Larry David

Women

“You have to discover when you're inadequate to be funny and you don't know you're inadequate when you're a kid.”

— Larry David

Funny

“There's also a certain rhythm to the way Jews talk that might be funny.”

— Larry David

Funny

“The lunch in a normal American restaurant is very problematic for me. I don't like to have hot food for lunch.”

— Larry David

Food

“Even back then, I exuded self-confidence, and that drives women crazy.”

— Larry David

Women