“Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework.”
Education“I often try to tell kids to think about all the people who love you, don't cry over the one person who doesn't.”
Love“Sex education may be a good idea in the schools, but I don't believe the kids should be given homework.”
Education“I cannot understand how the education of this United States of America has been fooled time and time again. Either make it separate but equal or integrate, therefore it will be equal. And it has been separate and unequal.”
Education“If you have no faith, you've lost your battle.”
Faith“Did you ever see the customers in health - food stores? They are pale, skinny people who look half - dead. In a steak house, you see robust, ruddy people. They're dying, of course, but they look terrific.”
Food“Having a child is surely the most beautifully irrational act that two people in love can commit.”
Love“Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.”
Home“Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.”
Funny“Women don't want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think - in a deeper voice.”
Women“Men and women belong to different species and communications between them is still in its infancy.”
Men“I think the part of media that romanticizes criminal behavior, things that a person will say against women, profanity, being gangster, having multiple children with multiple men and women and not wanting to is prevalent. When you look at the majority of shows on television they placate that kind of behavior.”
Men“The truth is that parents are not really interested in justice. They just want quiet.”
Parenting“A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.”
Funny“In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.”
Failure“I often try to tell kids to think about all the people who love you, don't cry over the one person who doesn't.”
Love“Through humor, you can soften some of the worst blows that life delivers. And once you find laughter, no matter how painful your situation might be, you can survive it.”
Humor“Poets have said that the reason to have children is to give yourself immortality. Immortality? Now that I have five children, my only hope is that they are all out of the house before I die.”
Hope“A new father quickly learns that his child invariably comes to the bathroom at precisely the times when he's in there, as if he needed company. The only way for this father to be certain of bathroom privacy is to shave at the gas station.”
Parenting“The heart of marriage is memories and if the two of you happen to have the same ones and can savor your reruns, then your marriage is a gift from the gods.”
Anniversary“The main goal of the future is to stop violence. The world is addicted to it.”
Future“There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God.”
Funny