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Mark Twain

100 quotes

Mark Twain (1835–1910) was the pen name of Samuel Langhorne Clemens, an American writer, humorist, and lecturer. Widely considered the "father of American literature," Twain is best known for *The Adventures of Tom Sawyer* and *Adventures of Huckleberry Finn*. His razor-sharp humor and social commentary have made him one of the most quoted writers in the English language.

“Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.”

— Mark Twain

Funny

All Quotes by Mark Twain

“The secret source of humor is not joy but sorrow there is no humor in Heaven.”

— Mark Twain

Humor

“Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.”

— Mark Twain

Newyears

“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.”

— Mark Twain

Business

“A man's character may be learned from the adjectives which he habitually uses in conversation.”

— Mark Twain

Communication

“The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.”

— Mark Twain

Best

“Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example.”

— Mark Twain

Good

“When people do not respect us we are sharply offended yet in his private heart no man much respects himself.”

— Mark Twain

Respect

“Thunder is good, thunder is impressive but it is lightning that does the work.”

— Mark Twain

Good

“Golf is a good walk spoiled.”

— Mark Twain

Good

“Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities Truth isn't.”

— Mark Twain

Truth

“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.”

— Mark Twain

Age

“It is not best that we should all think alike it is a difference of opinion that makes horse races.”

— Mark Twain

Best

“Patriot: the person who can holler the loudest without knowing what he is hollering about.”

— Mark Twain

Patriotism

“All generalizations are false, including this one.”

— Mark Twain

Funny

“Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.”

— Mark Twain

Food

“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”

— Mark Twain

Death

“My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.”

— Mark Twain

Great

“I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”

— Mark Twain

Death

“The finest clothing made is a person's own skin, but, of course, society demands something more than this.”

— Mark Twain

Society

“Lord save us all from a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms.”

— Mark Twain

Hope