“War will never cease until babies begin to come into the world with larger cerebrums and smaller adrenal glands.”
Peace“Legend: A lie that has attained the dignity of age.”
Age“War will never cease until babies begin to come into the world with larger cerebrums and smaller adrenal glands.”
Peace“Honor is simply the morality of superior men.”
Men“Bachelors know more about women than married men if they didn't they'd be married too.”
Marriage“It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man.”
Funny“Communism, like any other revealed religion, is largely made up of prophecies.”
Religion“Nine times out of ten, in the arts as in life, there is actually no truth to be discovered there is only error to be exposed.”
Truth“For it is mutual trust, even more than mutual interest that holds human associations together. Our friends seldom profit us but they make us feel safe. Marriage is a scheme to accomplish exactly that same end.”
Marriage“In this world of sin and sorrow there is always something to be thankful for as for me, I rejoice that I am not a Republican.”
Politics“The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.”
Politics“The theory seems to be that as long as a man is a failure he is one of God's children, but that as soon as he succeeds he is taken over by the Devil.”
Failure“All government, of course, is against liberty.”
Government“Whenever you hear a man speak of his love for his country, it is a sign that he expects to be paid for it.”
Love“Immorality: the morality of those who are having a better time.”
Time“It is impossible to imagine the universe run by a wise, just and omnipotent God, but it is quite easy to imagine it run by a board of gods.”
God“Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.”
Love“A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar.”
Good“To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia - to mistake an ordinary young woman for a goddess.”
Love“Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage.”
Art“I hate all sports as rabidly as a person who likes sports hates common sense.”
Sports“I believe that all government is evil, and that trying to improve it is largely a waste of time.”
Government