“Legend: A lie that has attained the dignity of age.”
Age“Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who would want to live in an institution?”
Funny“Legend: A lie that has attained the dignity of age.”
Age“Men have a much better time of it than women. For one thing, they marry later for another thing, they die earlier.”
Marriage“I hate all sports as rabidly as a person who likes sports hates common sense.”
Sports“On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.”
Great“If women believed in their husbands they would be a good deal happier and also a good deal more foolish.”
Good“Every man sees in his relatives, and especially in his cousins, a series of grotesque caricatures of himself.”
Relationship“Bachelors know more about women than married men if they didn't they'd be married too.”
Marriage“Love is an emotion that is based on an opinion of women that is impossible for those who have had any experience with them.”
Experience“The basic fact about human existence is not that it is a tragedy, but that it is a bore. It is not so much a war as an endless standing in line.”
Life“Puritanism. The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.”
Fear“A good politician is quite as unthinkable as an honest burglar.”
Good“To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia - to mistake an ordinary young woman for a goddess.”
Love“The one permanent emotion of the inferior man is fear - fear of the unknown, the complex, the inexplicable. What he wants above everything else is safety.”
Fear“The opera is to music what a bawdy house is to a cathedral.”
Music“Historian: an unsuccessful novelist.”
History“No one in this world has ever lost money by underestimating the intelligence of the great masses of the plain people. Nor has anyone ever lost public office thereby.”
Great“It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man.”
Funny“We must be willing to pay a price for freedom.”
Freedom“Honor is simply the morality of superior men.”
Men“It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf.”
Good