“I'm sorry, man, but I've got magic. I've got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time - and this includes naps - I'm an F-18, bro. And I will destroy you in the air. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground.”
Poetry
“The only thing I'm addicted to is winning. This bootleg cult, arrogantly referred to as Alcoholics Anonymous, reports a 5 percent success rate. My success rate is 100 percent.”
SuccessAll Quotes by Charlie Sheen
“I'm 0 for 3 with marriage - the scoreboard doesn't lie, never has. So what we all have is a marriage of the heart. To sully or contaminate or radically disrespect this union with a shameful contract is something that I will leave to the amateurs and the Bible grippers.”
Marriage“We're going to shoot one Polaroid per show. I'm going to sign this before it even develops because I know that once it develops with my signature on it, it's worth a fortune. I'll make this a work of magic warlock art.”
Art“The only thing I'm addicted to is winning. This bootleg cult, arrogantly referred to as Alcoholics Anonymous, reports a 5 percent success rate. My success rate is 100 percent.”
Success“I just don't want to live like I used to. And at some point, I'm going to put a gag order on myself in terms of talking about the past. I've got to slam the door and deal with the present and the future.”
Future“Dad kept us out of school, but school comes and goes. Family is forever.”
Dad“What is a normal childhood? We weren't rich, we were pretty middle-class. My dad survived from job to job with him taking care of so many relatives, he couldn't save any money.”
Dad“I tried marriage. I'm 0 for 3 with the marriage thing. So, being a ballplayer - I believe in numbers. I'm not going 0 for 4. I'm not wearing a golden sombrero.”
Marriage“People say you have to work on your resentments. Yeah, no, I'm gonna hang onto them and they're gonna fuel my attack.”
Work“When friends asked me, Can we help? I'd say, Not unless you can alter time, speed up the harvest or teleport me off this rock. I used that line from Star Wars.”
Time“I think what drove me insane for a long time is feeling like I hadn't earned most of what I achieved because it came so fast.”
Time“What they're not ready for is guys like you and I and Nails and all the other gnarly gnarlingtons in my life, that we are high priests, Vatican assassin warlocks. Boom. Print that, people. See where that goes.”
Life“I think my passion is misinterpreted as anger sometimes. And I don't think people are ready for the message that I'm delivering, and delivering with a sense of violent love.”
Anger“But you can't focus on things that matter if all you've been is asleep for forty years. Funny how sleep rhymes with sheep. You know.”
Funny“Life all comes down to a few moments. This is one of them.”
Life“You either love or you hate. You live in the middle, you get nothing.”
Love“Dad almost died of a heart attack in the middle of making Apocalypse Now, the biggest movie of his life. It doesn't make you want to jump into that business.”
Business“I try to be known more for my work than for anything else.”
Work“I'm dealing with fools and trolls and soft targets. It's just strafing runs in my underwear before my first cup of coffee. I don't have time for these clowns.”
Time“Here's the good news. If I realize that I'm insane, then I'm okay with it. I'm not dangerous insane.”
Good