“Perseverance - a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.”
Success“It is evident that skepticism, while it makes no actual change in man, always makes him feel better.”
Change“Perseverance - a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.”
Success“Experience - the wisdom that enables us to recognise in an undesirable old acquaintance the folly that we have already embraced.”
Experience“Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.”
Good“Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.”
Anger“History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.”
History“Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.”
Sports“Sabbath - a weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the world in six days and was arrested on the seventh.”
God“The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.”
Business“In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.”
Government“Women in love are less ashamed than men. They have less to be ashamed of.”
Men“Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.”
Time“Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.”
Business“Jealous, adj. Unduly concerned about the preservation of that which can be lost only if not worth keeping.”
Jealousy“Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.”
Art“Forgetfulness - a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.”
God“Inventor: A person who makes an ingenious arrangement of wheels, levers and springs, and believes it civilization.”
Technology“Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.”
Marriage“Meekness: Uncommon patience in planning a revenge that is worth while.”
Patience“Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.”
Power“Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.”
Art