“Meekness: Uncommon patience in planning a revenge that is worth while.”
Patience“The gambling known as business looks with austere disfavor upon the business known as gambling.”
Business“Meekness: Uncommon patience in planning a revenge that is worth while.”
Patience“Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.”
Love“Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.”
Mom“Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.”
Future“To be positive is to be mistaken at the top of one's voice.”
Positive“Alliance - in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.”
Politics“Learning, n. The kind of ignorance distinguishing the studious.”
Education“Clairvoyant, n.: A person, commonly a woman, who has the power of seeing that which is invisible to her patron - namely, that he is a blockhead.”
Power“Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.”
Famous“Sabbath - a weekly festival having its origin in the fact that God made the world in six days and was arrested on the seventh.”
God“Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.”
Politics“The small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify we give the name of knowledge.”
Knowledge“Land: A part of the earth's surface, considered as property. The theory that land is property subject to private ownership and control is the foundation of modern society, and is eminently worthy of the superstructure.”
Society“Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.”
Intelligence“Men become civilized, not in proportion to their willingness to believe, but in proportion to their readiness to doubt.”
Men“Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.”
Education“Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.”
Art“Irreligion - the principal one of the great faiths of the world.”
Great“War is God's way of teaching Americans geography.”
God“Childhood: the period of human life intermediate between the idiocy of infancy and the folly of youth - two removes from the sin of manhood and three from the remorse of age.”
Age