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Ambrose Bierce

81 quotes

Ambrose Bierce (1842–circa 1914) was an American short story writer, journalist, and satirist best known for his darkly humorous *The Devil's Dictionary*, which redefined common words with biting cynicism. A Civil War veteran, Bierce brought a sharp, unsentimental eye to American life and politics.

“Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Intelligence

All Quotes by Ambrose Bierce

“Famous, adj.: Conspicuously miserable.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Famous

“Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Technology

“Logic: The art of thinking and reasoning in strict accordance with the limitations and incapacities of the human misunderstanding.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Art

“Inventor: A person who makes an ingenious arrangement of wheels, levers and springs, and believes it civilization.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Technology

“The best thing to do with the best things in life is to give them up.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Best

“It is evident that skepticism, while it makes no actual change in man, always makes him feel better.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Change

“Men become civilized, not in proportion to their willingness to believe, but in proportion to their readiness to doubt.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Men

“Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Fear

“Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Good

“Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Art

“A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Failure

“Success is the one unpardonable sin against our fellows.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Success

“Experience is a revelation in the light of which we renounce our errors of youth for those of age.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Age

“Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Politics

“Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Hope

“Eulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Power

“Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Money

“Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Time

“Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Beauty

“Alliance - in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.”

— Ambrose Bierce

Politics